Gym Class Boner

I had my track-pants and my tennis shoes
I couldn’t think of a good excuse
Had to hide in the equipment room
So they wouldn’t see my pants balloon

I got a gym class boner

It just happened spontaneously
I couldn’t bend it down enough to pee
The kids were laughing it was quite an event
They caught me standing there pitching a tent

I got a gym class boner
A gym class boner

   You can’t hide behind your desk
   And hide it in a jiffy
   When you’re running ‘round the track
   And you start to get a stiffy

I don’t know why it happens all the time
It prob’ly happens cos I’m only nine
Comic books and the family dog
Are just a couple things that stiffen my log

I got a gym class boner

I just wish it would go away
Guys in the locker gonna think that I’m gay
I can’t stop it can’t concentrate
I haven’t taught myself to masturbate

I got a gym class boner
A gym class boner

   Everybody’s laughing at me
   And I wish that I were dead
   But at least I’m not like Gary
   I hear that fucker wets the bed

Gym class boner, oh no!

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